King Deighv - anti-rain activist

King Deighv is in the living room again, formally protesting the weather. Deighv is my 11-year-old cat, named after an imaginary Monty Python character. Don't ask. It's pronounced Dave, like Letterman, only that would be far too prosaic a name for this tiny bundle of quirk.

Deighv has been in the house for about a day now. He prefers being outside but equally prefers being dry; hence, his dilemma. Since the rain started late Friday night, he has complained loudly about every 45 minutes, standing just inside the pet door and dripping a kitty-shaped puddle onto the wood floor. See, Deighv thinks I control the weather. After filing a report at least hourly for the last 36, he temporarily gave up his alpha role (oh yes, even over Bella the dog) in our house and is now napping peacefully on a rug by the front door.

He will probably remain there for 3 weeks, apart from the rude interruptions I create when I have to leave the house. Every 3- 4 weeks, Deighv picks a new spot from which to reign. Usually nothing deters Deighv from his chosen spot. Deighv spent 3 weeks inside the washing machine, leaving only when I would start the water. He spent almost a month in the bathtub. Other kitty thrones have included the top of a ladder on the back porch, on top of a viga over the porch, in a bed of cacti, and in the dog's bed.

He doesn't stay there 24/7, though, because he has self-appointed duties. When Bella and I go for walks in the park behind the house, Deighv will either follow or stay by the gate to guard the perimeter of the house. He is fearless. I once saw him chase an 80-lb dog all the way from our back gate to the dog's house across the park. Another time I put a stray in the backyard while I tracked down the owner, and came out to find a dog-shaped hole in the wooden gate - Deighv had chased the dog out right throught the gate. He growls ferociously, and requires passing dogs (and their owners) to allow a 10-foot semi-circle of safety from the back gate out into the alley and park.

If Bella is annoying him too much, he lays on top of her favorite ball and lowers his eyelids until she retreats to the couch. One time during a 3-week stint on the coffee table, he made eye contact with me while he pushed my full coffee cup onto the floor because it was too close to his space.

My "cat people" friends insist that Deighv be kept inside to keep him safe and have a longer life. They don't understand that the only thing I control around here is the weather.