De-evolution

I sort of grew up with feminism. I had a lot of experiences with discrimination that my younger friends may find hard to believe. At 17 I had a boss who would not let me leave my part-time job at the end of the day until I gave him a hug. At 20 I was let go from an entry-level job, the first in my field, because "a man needed it."

Obviously, things have improved. Discrimination is more subtle, because outright discrimination is now illegal. And some women WANT big diamonds and to be treated like sex objects. I haven't figured that out yet, but hey, if they want it, fine with me. A major point of feminism is that you can choose, and things are not assumed for you.

One idea that has snuck back from caveman days, though, is that women are all waiting around to meet men, are miserable without them, and do not have vital, interesting lives apart from them. This cracks me up whenever I hear or see it. Some women buy into it though, because can there be any other reason to spend $600 on 4" heels, or to wear spaghetti straps in 40-degree weather? This makes me sad.

So I ignore all that until somebody actually makes me deal with it using subterfuge. Hence, I met a new type of knuckle dragger last week. This new type is educated, verbal, and politically aware, yet uses candor as a weapon and a protective device. And I don't mean wit or sarcasm, which are also easy distancing tools to use. I mean candor.

There is a vanity inherent in a certain type of candor that isn't worth it no matter how insecure one is. This new type of knuckle dragger cherishes his opinions as fact, and cherishes them more than he cherishes the feelings of others. This knuckle dragger is not interested in discussion, debate, or really, the opinions of anyone else. My guess is, though, that if there were other men present, their opinions would not be as readily decimated.

I believe that the largest part of evolving means being civil. I do not mean politically correct, or game-playing, or being in touch with your feminine side - I just mean civil. Some men have so far to go, are really so inherently clueless, that I wish there was a class in evolving, just to give them a leg up. But, the target audience would never think they needed it.